Morbidly Obese

So here's the thing-

I am the last person in the world to criticize and/or judge an overweight person. Seriously. Having been overweight for pretty much all my life, I'm not going to go around being the pot that calls the kettle black. Everyone knows the health risks associated with being overweight/obese- heart attack, stroke, diabetes, cancer, and hypertension, to name a few. And that's not even taking into account the mental toll it can take on a person- low self-esteem, lack of self confidence/self-worth, being bullied by others, and simply just feeling defeated before you even try. It's not a good place to be in no matter how you try to spin it.

There was an article on Buzzfeed today, about a 40 year old lady who was the "proud owner" of the largest hips in the world- measuring a whopping 8 feet in circumference. That's 96 inches.

The article mentions that her weight gain began after her first pregnancy and continued after three subsequent ones. She's tried to lose weight through fad diets which haven't worked and now she claims she's happy with her body and eats 3,000 calories a day to maintain her figure. She can't run on land but does water aerobics to exercise and works hard to stay healthy. She goes on to mention that her husband loves her figure and that it doesn't affect their love life. She states that men don't like skinny girls and that they prefer hourglass figures. She also mentions that she looks great and hopes to inspire women to be happy with their own bodies.

Look, I am ALL for self-confidence. I envy the people who walk into a room with their heads held high. If you're a bigger person and you are comfortable in your skin and you don't let your weight define your mental state of mind, then more power to you! I respect you a lot for being able to maintain that mindset. I wish I liked myself more. I'm definitely not a fan of the person I see in the mirror- but I have taken necessary steps to work on changing her. It's a struggle that I go through everyday. And some days are better than others.

But I digress. The fact of the matter is that from a medical standpoint, there is absolutely nothing healthy or positive about this individual. Lets talk numbers. This lady is 5 feet 4 inches tall and weighs 420 pounds. This amounts to a body mass index of 72. Accepted BMI values for individuals at a normal weight range  anywhere between 18-24.9. So, at her height, this lady should ideally weigh between 105-145 lbs.

That said, no matter how happy you might be with yourself or how confident you feel in your skin this weight is a death sentence. People don't walk around with dynamite strapped to their waists for the hell of it. And if by some chance, they do, would they be playing with matches near it? Not likely! In the same vein, this lady is willingly walking around with 96 inches of fat (dynamite) that will likely kill her. And on top of that, she is eating 3,000 calories a day (playing with matches) to maintain her own figure. Why is she perpetuating an existence that is one of a ticking time bomb??

I appreciate that she can be obese and comfortable in her skin. That's fine. It's a difficult life to live when you wake up every day not liking yourself. But the fact that she says she doesn't want to lose her curves, that she feels great, and eats to maintain her figure- what is that ultimately saying? Is it okay to be obese as long as you love yourself? Sure you say you look great and feel confident. And your husband loves your figure and doesn't have any problems with it. And your kids love you. And you are no doubt surrounded by people who care for you. But if you REALLY loved yourself, wouldn't you try everything in your power to physically be a healthier person? Love yourself enough to work to find a way to take off that extra weight so that you might live longer- not just for your family but yourself as well? Set a better example for your kids of what it means to respect your body?

I'll use myself as an example. Despite being an active kid, having a paucity of junk food around the house growing up, etc. I've always been overweight. The underlying cause is primarily endocrine related but that's neither here nor there. I experienced my share of bullying growing up, but I was fortunate to be spared the worst of it. Throughout it all, I've been incredibly fortunate to have the strength of my family and friends to rely on. I was never the most popular person in school, but I also never once lacked friends growing up. In fact, I have some of the most incredible, supportive, and sincere friends who have never once made me feel like less of a person for being bigger than they are. They love me unconditionally for who am I on the inside and not what I look like. But I would never think to use the comfort that I find in their love, support and acceptance of me as an excuse to NOT take better care of myself and be healthy. The fact that I have people in my life who love me and who I love right back, makes me want to be here for years and years to come so that I can be there with them. I want to dance at their weddings, play with their kids, and be there if they need to call someone at 2 in the morning with some random medical concern. I want to be better for myself and I want to be better because of them.

Loving yourself means respecting yourself enough to put the effort into taking care of yourself- body and mind. And while the lady in this article might not be suffering from the psychological ramifications of obesity, the physical effects are aplenty! Having a BMI of over 40 makes a person morbidly obese. They wouldn't have termed it morbid obesity if it was healthy for you would they?! Off the top of my head, let me list some of the consequences of obesity for you:

• Heart attacks
• Heart failure
• Hypertension
• Atherosclerosis
• Gallstones
• Fatty liver disease
• Diabetes
• Pulmonary embolisms
• Deep vein thrombosis
• Infertility
• Birth defects
• Fetal death
• Stroke
• Migraines
• Depression
• Gout
• Arthritis
• Cancer- breast, ovarian, colorectal, liver, pancreatic, cervical, prostate, renal- to name a few
• Sleep apnea
• Erectile dysfunction
• Renal failure
• DEATH as a result of complications from any of the above

-Tell me how great you are going to feel when you die prematurely because of any of those things I listed above?

-Tell me how your family who loves you so much is going to feel when you die young and leave them behind
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-Tell me how your 3,000 calorie a day diet is going to help you live a long and satisfying life where you get to grow old with your husband and watch your kids grow up and play with your grandkids?

Tell me how any of this is supposed to be "positive".

You know what is positive? People who care enough about themselves to work towards being healthy. It's not about what society glamorizes as being attractive. It's about respecting yourself enough to make the attempt to treat yourself well. And listen, I know we're not perfect. Even the people with six-packs and ripped calves, and buns of steels fall have their moments of weakness. It happens all the damn time. But the difference is that you get back up, you learn from your mistakes, you get back on track, and you try every day to do what's good for you. So much of the battle is just deciding that you are capable of continuing to do something no matter how many setbacks you have.

Being morbidly thin or morbidly obese is not healthy. And justifying being at those extremes by saying "I feel great and I love myself and the people who care about me love me as I am so I'm not going to change" is a complete cop-out. Love yourself enough to treat yourself right in every aspect of your life. Do better for yourself. Don't settle for something that is less than ideal because you've failed before or it's too much work to try to do better. Love yourself enough to want to stick around for a good long time so you can enjoy this one life that you were given.

Love yourself because you are worth it.